FAIL.

In the interest of full disclosure--that's what this whole thing is about, yes?--I thought I might share some of my most recent 'Fails':

FAIL #1: I realized this evening that I hadn't brushed my teeth. Since Sunday morning.

FAIL #2: Out of pure curiosity--the only time I was aware of people actually using it was as a terrible aid for tanning--I put on baby oil after my shower. I was out of lotion and it clearly stated "24 hours of moisture". Nice! It DIDN'T say that it leaves you feeling like a greased pig. The Muffin tried to lay his head on my shoulder while I was reading him a bed time story and it slid right off! (However I do smell pleasant...)

Happy One Month Birthday SweetTart!

Our little SweetTart is now over a month old. I can't say I'm sad to see the first month behind us--if that makes me sound like a monster mom, so be it--but things are definitely a bit calmer now. Nursing has gotten so much smoother, I'd forgotten about the 'nipples of fire' that the first two weeks bring, and her sleeping schedule has gotten better and more uniform. In fact, she has now slept through the night three times! (I don't think the Muffin blessed us with a full night's sleep until he was closer to two or three months old.) If she doesn't sleep through the night, she usually goes down between 10pm and 11pm and then gets up at 3am and then 6 or 7am. The only complaint that I have, which really isn't a complaint, is that most nights after the 3am feeding she is awake. Not fussy,which is wonderful, but just AWAKE. So, either BabyDaddy or I will bring her into the living room and hang out until she gets tired or wants to nurse again. To be sure, I will be singing happy songs when she is consistently sleeping through the night, but having the Muffin's 'up every 2 hours' infant schedule to compare it to, I'm trying really hard not to call her dirty names when she wakes me up in the wee hours. :)

The Muffin is a wonderful big brother. He watches SweetTart like a hawk, and I do mean that in the most literal of forms. It's like a constant play-by-play:

"Mommy! I hear that squishy noise...I think she's pooping again!"
"Mommy! She's got the hiccups!
"Mommy! She just sneezed two times!
"Mommy! I think I see a booger in her nose!"
"Mommy! She's making sad faces!"

Another interesting thing to see is his reaction to breast feeding. At first, he was a little squeamish, until I explained that was how I fed him when he was a baby too. Then he started asking questions, my favorite of which was, "Does it come in chocolate too?" Nothing like an inquisitive kid, eh?

Other fun facts about SweetTart:
*She's still got those baby blues---in fact, I think they are even lightening up some.

*She is a talker! Unless she is in a really deep sleep, she is constantly grunting or chattering. Even the doctor commented on it. To be fair, if I had to choose between grunting or screaming, I'll gladly take the grunts!

*She is already rolling over onto her side. In fact, she does this pretty much every time you lay her down on her back. It makes for some very interesting diaper changes.

*She loves riding in the car, but it's almost like she has a motion sensor. Red light/traffic jam=SCREAMING FIT. Smooth and steady acceleration=SILENCE. PeePaw Jones in his caddy/tractor hauling 800 bales of hay=MINI APOCALYPSE. Continued speeds of 50 mph or higher=PEACE.

*She is finally fitting into her clothes better! Bless her ever-lovin' heart, for the first few weeks, everything but newborn sizes made her look like a homeless hobbit baby. We were NOT ready for that--the Muffin weighed only 4 oz more than SweetTart, but he could never fit into newborn clothes. He went straight into 0-3 months and was even up to 3-6 months by the time he was probably 8 or 9 weeks old. So at last, SweetTart is getting too big for her newborn outfits and is fitting snuggly into 0-3!

Ahhhh, the silence is shattered. The princess is calling!

I'm Back Ya'll!

So it's been what, like 6 months? Yep, I think that's about right. Let's catch up, shall we?

* Found out we were players on Team Pink--yes I spawned a female, much to the surprise of everyone on both sides of the family--and immediately ruffles and ribbons began creeping into our home.

*Got bigger.

*Enjoyed several short weekends away.

*Got bigger.

*Redecorated the kiddos' room.

*Got really stinking big.

*Enjoyed the state fair.

*

Okay, really? Can a uterus expand any more without exploding? (Apparently....yes.)

*And finally, after months and months of anticipation....I twisted my midwife's arm and got myself induced! (Take notice of the extreme air of excitement surrounding BabyDaddy's face.)

*She's here--Introducing the newest princess-in-residence, our little Sweet Tart!

As you can see, SweetTart is a little blond bombshell like her Daddy. It appears that she will have his blue eyes too...one can only hope that she inherits my cultural sense and aversion to dead animals. The Muffin has been getting better with her each day. In the beginning, he pretty much ignored her, except to say, "Um, Mommy? She's really loud and I can't sleep. Do you think you could feed her or something?" Bless his little golden heart. (I'm of course thinking, "Darling, if I wasn't nursing and your almost four-year-old little fingers could hold a bottle, and if it wasn't totally wrong, don't think for a SECOND that I wouldn't prop YOU up on the couch with her.) Ahhhh, infancy. I'll be happy when she's consistently sleeping through the night. She's done it twice now, and I'm praying the streak will continue!!!

And so the world spins....and our household expands!

I don't mind rainy, gray afternoons at all. Especially when those rainy afternoons just happen to fall on a weekend -- this means that I can sit on the couch in my pajamas and have an excuse not to move for a while. (But really, when have I ever needed an "excuse" not to move for a while? I'm a not-moving pro, as I'm sure BabyDaddy can attest.) The only problem is that I have a ridiculous sinus headache that is making me want to either snap off my nose or prize out my eyeballs --I'm an overly safe attempt-not-to-take-any-medication-unless-near-death pregnant person, so I am trying to tough it out. DISCLAIMER: I completely reserve the right to whine to my heart's content. I am making no attempts at curbing THAT. So pound away sinus pressure! I will whine you out! It's unfortunate that I have to follow BD around the house in order to have someone to listen to my angst. He keeps mysteriously migrating away from me. I have no idea why. Now he's out in the garage, and the door is curiously locked. Hmmmmmm. So, I've resorted to sitting on top of the dryer with my mouth pressed against the crack of the garage door trying to make sure my plaintive cries are heard over the hammering, sanding, and general racket taking place. Blast - he just turned on the radio. That devious man. Ah well, I guess it's back to the couch for me again. BD should be ashamed of himself. This is like, the majority of his married job!

Things have been relatively calm here for the past couple of weeks, which is always wonderful. No "practice" 911 calls, no near-disasters, no feeding foreign objects to the dogs, (I don't even think I mentioned that debacle...poor Miss Bug puked Fisher Price body parts for days). It's been good! I feel fabulous, other than the beginnings of some really random, hard to resist cravings -- like that box of donut holes. I do feel ever so bad about that on this side of things... I go back soon for my four month check up, and we'll get to schedule the 'big' ultrasound. Oh, to finally figure out what this kiddo is going to be! We're all looking forward to that; I despise not knowing things. Here are a few of my favorite things from the past couple of weeks:

Spring flowers -- I adore tulips! You can hardly look at them without feeling instantly happier.

Playing in the rain - everyone should do it!

Birthday cakes with several, well ---ahem---LOTS of candles. Happy Birthday BabyDaddy!

"Flying". (BD may be getting older, but he's still a kid at heart!)

Throwing rocks in the creek.

And last, but certainly not least...playing in the dirt! The Muffin has been so fascinated with dirt lately. I have decided that instead of spending money on a sand box, we should just have a dirt box instead. Much more economical!!

You Gotta Dig!

We LOVE the new Disney movie Princess and the Frog. Like, some kinda C-R-A-Z-Y love. One of our favorite songs on the movie is "Dig a Little Deeper". It always makes me smile!

"911....What's your emergency?"

"Look, Mama, Look! I call 9-1-1, just wike on Safety Patrol!"

NOT exactly the words you want to hear erupting from your three-year-old's mouth early on a Saturday morning. Unfortunately, I did. Upon seeing the horrified look on my face, the Muffin immediately froze, flipped the phone closed, and dropped it to the floor.



"CRAP!" I screamed. "CRAP!CRAP!CRAP!"

"Mama, what do 'cwap' mean?"

"Don't you worry about what it means. You just don't say that okay? Mommy shouldn't have said that.." ***Cell phone begins to trill*** "OH, CRAP!"

"Mama, you said 'dat word again...."

"AAAAHHHHH!"

Then I did the thing I was always amazed at my mother for doing. She could be screeching bloody wrath at my brother and I and then calmly turn to the ringing phone, pick it up, and croon, "Hello?" as pretty as you please.

"Hellooooooo?"

"911 Dispatch calling here. We had a hang-up reported with this number. Is everything all right ma'am?"

*Nervous laughter* "Oh, yes, we're just fine. I apologize. That was my three year old. He's learned how to call 911 from a tv show and I guess he was practicing. Again, I'm so sorry!"

"That's fine ma'am. We just wanted to make sure you were okay. You have a nice day now."

You'd have thought that would have been the end of it. You would have thought. But then again, surprises are what make life interesting yes? As on most early Saturday mornings, BabyDaddy was still snuggled up in the bed with a pillow over his face when I went to tell him what had just happened. "You know, I bet the cops will still come..."

**DING. DONG.***

Mind you, I was still in my (unmatched) pajamas, bed-headed, teeth unbrushed, and mascara ringed. The Muffin had just gone to the potty, and for some reason, every time he does this he thinks he needs to completely take off his pants and underwear. So, he was running around bare-bottomed. The dogs were fighting each other over the couch pillows, snarling and snapping, as I peeked out the front curtains to see a police cruiser parked in front of the house. I open the door and smile wearily at the police man standing on our front steps. The Muffin begins jumping up and down shouting, "Wow, look! A police man! Coooooool!" (Somehow the 'jumping' thing makes the 'bare-bottomed' thing even worse.) As I am fighting internal panic, (this dude is TOTALLY going to call DFS on me about my nekkid, dancing, 911-calling kid), I explain the situation. He was very polite, ("It happens all the time ma'am. Just doing my job.") and made me feel a little bit better about everything. He even gave the Muffin a high five before I banished him to his room with orders to clothe himself. The policeman finally left, and I was able to sink into the corner of the couch to contemplate my complete and utter mortification for the rest of the morning. Bah.

Glee is Back Next Week!!!

THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!!!!!!!!!!!

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT

Lan' sakes, where have I been?! What in goodness name is so bloody important as to keep me away from my dear blog for weeks upon weeks? S. L. E. E. P. I've been sleeping since about the middle of February, because that was just about the time we found out I was **shhhh** 'in the family way'. Yes, yes -- with child, pregnant, knocked up, bun-in-the-oven, preggers, (hate it), prego, (hate it even more), expecting, or just plain having a baby. I'll give it to you straight:

How far along are you? A little over three months.

When are you due? This October

Putting on a little weight are you? I'll thank you to know that at my OB appointment last Friday I had lost 5 pounds -- which, if you've seen me recently, is a bit hard to fathom.

Sending BabyDaddy out to satisfy any particular food cravings? Baked potatoes....LOTS of baked potatoes. And all oozing with butter and sour cream.

Gender Hopes? BD is holding out for another boy. The Muffin wants a girl. No kidding - I really am ambivalent, as long as its healthy. It would be nice to have a girl, because then we'd have one of each. BUT, it would also be nice to have another boy, because we've already got the gear.

Belly button in or out? Strangely, it's sort of flat. Like a belly button pancake. (MMmmmm. Pancakes.....) ***Break for a quick snack***

What I miss most: CCCCCccccccOoooOOOOFFFFFfffffeeEEEEEE. On a positive note, my OB just cleared me to have one, count em', ONE serving a day. I'll probably do decaf just to be safe.

What I'm loving: Successfully coming to the other side of my big 12 week, make-it-or-break-it appointment. I feel like I can now breathe a big sigh of relief and flip the bird to the first trimester.

Snow is delightful! (But only if I'm not required to drive in it...)

Every once in a while, a snow day is a wonderful thing. I always hate trying to make the call of whether to brave the elements and try to make it to work - you almost never really know until you get out and try it. And then, even if you get in your car and begin to slide around on the road like butter in a hot skillet, you feel silly turning back. You've made it this far right? You might as well just finish it up and go on in. Today however, I decided to play it safe. After attempting to sweep the piles of snow off my car while trying to keep my balance, and then watching the sleet start to fall, I decided to throw in the white towel for today. So the Muffin and I were snowbound! (And sometimes, that is just the only way to salvage a sleety, slushy mess of a day.)

REQUIREMENTS FOR A SNOW DAY:

Pancakes for Breakfast!

Yum!

Snowy skylight.

Fuzzy socks for everyone!

Rocking chair, (preferably by the window so you can watch the snow), good book, and mug of hot chocolate - although not necessarily in that order.

Ummm?

Yesterday, my son wore underwear on his head for two hours. He would scream hysterically if you got near him and he thought you were going to take them off. Actually, according to him,

“Dey not no unner-wears Momma, dey is my ‘Piderman mask!”

So, apparently, now we have a revolving cast of super heroes. Last week was Batman, this week a Fruit-of-the-Loom sporting Spiderman. I ADORE the imagination of a kid! (And at least the underwear were clean…)

Friday Firsts

The first line can make or break a reader’s interest. Just how well did the author pull you in to the story with their first sentence? Participating in this weekly book meme is extremely easy, so bring it on! (And don’t forget to link back to Well-Read Reviews!)

*Grab the book you are currently reading and open to the first page.
*Write down the first sentence in the first paragraph.

*Create a blog post with this information. (Make sure to include the title & author of the book you are using.) Did this first sentence help draw you into the story? Why or why not?

*Link back to Well-Read Reviews in your blog entry.

Share your Friday Firsts here! Leave a comment – if you don’t have a blog, just share your book’s title, author, and first sentence. If you do, don’t forget to link back so I can visit!

My Friday Firsts is from: White is For Witching, by Helen Oyeyemi

Miranda Silver is in Dover, in the ground beneath her mother’s house.
Her throat is blocked with a slice of apple
(to stop her from speaking words that may betray her)
Her ears are filled with earth
(to keep her from hearing sounds that confuse her)
Her eyes are closed, but
Her heart thrums like hummingbird wings.

Synopsis: (Taken from Amazon.com)This novel weaves a tale of four generations of women and the house in Dover, England, they’ve inhabited—a vengeful, Gothic edifice that has always rejected strangers. The latest occupants are twins Miranda and Eliot, who were 16 when their mother, Lily, died and when their father, Luc, converted the house into a B&B. Miranda’s grief is “far far bigger than her.” She develops pica, an eating disorder, eschewing her father’s cooking and binging on hidden caches of chalk and plastic. After Miranda is discharged from a clinic, Eliot grapples with his brotherly responsibilities, telling Lily’s ghost, “She won’t forget or recover, she is inconsolable.” Lily’s mentally ill mother and grandmother still “inhabit” the house—each understanding that “we absolutely cannot have anyone else.” Oyeyemi’s style is as engimatic as her plot, with juxtaposition of past and present and abrupt changes in narrator, from third to first person, Eliot to Miranda, Lily to her mother. In all, a challenging read laced with thought-provoking story lines that end, like Miranda’s fate, mysteriously.


Thoughts: Sorry, I know I totally gave you more than one sentence. But I had to share this first section. Just the set-up and punctuation grabbed me at first, but then I got sucked in with the text. I’ll tell you, it’s certainly not a “breeze-read”, but I’m quite engaged in the story already. I’m wondering, is the girl dead? But no, it says that her heart is still beating. Is she trapped? Hmmm, a possibility. Guess I’ll have to read further to find out!

Teaser Tuesdays!

Teaser Tuesdays is a weekly bookish meme, hosted by MizB of Should Be Reading. You can play too! Just do the following:
*Grab your current read.

*Open to a random page.

*Share two (2) “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page. --BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS!-- (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)

*Share the title & author, too, so that other TT participants can add the book to their TBR Lists if they like your teasers!

My Teaser is From: The Handmaid’s Tale – By Margaret Atwood

Synopsis: (Taken From Amazon)
Offred is a Handmaid in the Republic of Gilead. She may leave the home of the Commander and his wife once a day to walk to food markets whose signs are now pictures instead of words because women are no longer allowed to read. She must lie on her back once a month and pray that the Commander makes her pregnant, because in an age of declining births, Offred and the other Handmaids are only valued if their ovaries are viable. Offred can remember the days before, when she lived and made love with her husband Luke; when she played with and protected her daughter; when she had a job, money of her own, and access to knowledge. But all of that is gone now....

Teaser:

When there’s someone hanging on the wall, at least you know the worst. But vacant, it is also potential, like a storm approaching. When I can see the bodies, the actual bodies, when I can guess from the sizes and shapes that none of them is Luke, I can believe also that he is still alive.

Today I found out.....

...that Batman lives at my house. :)

Because it's all about.....

....starting the day off right. Happy Friday everyone!

My Favorite Things!

It's been a while since the last time I posted a "My Favorite Things" list, and I'd say we're well overdue. For a little intro, the past week has been a blur (a good blur mind you), so that explains why you've had a Meg-free seven days. The Muffin turned three - we won't talk about it a lot, lest I tear up AGAIN -- and we had a wonderful party with family and friends, but it pretty much had my panties in a twist for most of last week. Ya'll know how I stress about things now... However, it ended up being a weekend of good fun and lots of laughs, (thanks a lot to an impromptu sleep-over with several of the party guests and a good deal of great wine). Since I'm now thoroughly encased in my annual winter rut (no more holidays, birthdays, or parties to look forward to for a while), I thought I would think back over some of my most recent "favorite things":

A handmade birthday card from my Nanny to the Muffin

The Muffin's planet night-light. This was an el-cheapo $5 Wal-Mart purchase, but we have had so much fun laying in bed and looking at our 'universe' each night!

Foam Pits -- After the Muffin's bday swaree' at the Gymnastics gym, I have decided that I want to rip up my living room floor and install one of these babies.

Denman's 3-Row Styling Comb - my very dear, (and uber stylish) friend Laura introduced me to this little marvel while visiting for the Muffin's bday. Of course, the bane of all television news personalities is flat hair, so Laura - being our home-town celebrity and all - uses it to always look fab on the air. I was amazed after a quick back-comb from this baby, I had 'Bump-It' worthy hair all afternoon without the Bump-It! (The comb is a mere $2.99 at Sally's Beauty Supply, compared to $9.99 for the Bump-It.)

Coffee Mug I made at Polka Dot Pots with the Muffin and BD. I drink out of it every day at work!

Friday Firsts

The first line can make or break a reader’s interest. Just how well did the author pull you in to the story with their first sentence? Participating in this weekly book meme is extremely easy, so bring it on! (And don’t forget to link back to Well-Read Reviews!)

*Grab the book you are currently reading and open to the first page.
*Write down the first sentence in the first paragraph.
*Create a blog post with this information. (Make sure to include the title & author of the book you are using.) Did this first sentence help draw you into the story? Why or why not?
*Link back to Well-Read Reviews in your blog entry.

Share your Friday Firsts here! Leave a comment – if you don’t have a blog, just share your book’s title, author, and first sentence. If you do, don’t forget to link back so I can visit!

My Friday Firsts is from: Moloka’i, by Alan Brennert

Later, when memory was all she had to sustain her, she would come to cherish it: Old Honolulu as it was then, as it would never be again.

Synopsis: (Taken from Amazon.com)

This richly imagined novel, set in Hawaii more than a century ago, is an extraordinary epic of a little-known time and place---and a deeply moving testament to the resiliency of the human spirit. Rachel Kalama, a spirited seven-year-old Hawaiian girl, dreams of visiting far-off lands like her father, a merchant seaman. Then one day a rose-colored mark appears on her skin, and those dreams are stolen from her. Taken from her home and family, Rachel is sent to Kalaupapa, the quarantined leprosy settlement on the island of Moloka'i. Here her life is supposed to end---but instead she discovers it is only just beginning. With a vibrant cast of vividly realized characters, Moloka'i is the true-to-life chronicle of a people who embraced life in the face of death.

Thoughts: Magic. And romance. What else could there be in “Old Honolulu”? Plus, I love ‘saga’ and generational type stories because you get to see the whole scope of a character. And that is what sounds like this book will be!

Teaser Tuesdays!

Teaser Tuesdays is a weekly bookish meme, hosted by MizB of Should Be Reading. You can play too! Just do the following:
*Grab your current read.

*Open to a random page.

*Share two (2) “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page. --BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS!-- (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)

*Share the title & author, too, so that other TT participants can add the book to their TBR Lists if they like your teasers!

If you have a teaser on this lovely Tuesday, leave a comment on this post with your link!

My Teaser is From: The Red Scarf – By Kate Furnivall

Synopsis: (Taken From Amazon)
Davinsky Labor Camp, Siberia, 1933: Only two things in this wretched place keep Sofia from giving up hope: the prospect of freedom, and the stories told by her friend and fellow prisoner Anna, of a charmed childhood in Petrograd, and her fervent girlhood love for a passionate revolutionary named Vasily. After a perilous escape, Sofia endures months of desolation and hardship. But, clinging to a promise she made to Anna, she subsists on the belief that someday she will track down Vasily. In a remote village, she’s nursed back to health by a Gypsy family, and there she finds more than refuge—she also finds Mikhail Pashin, who, her heart tells her, is Vasily in disguise. He’s everything she has ever wanted—but he belongs to Anna.

Teaser:
She was lying on the bedboard, her breath fast and shallow, her skin splitting wherever it was touched. She felt that she had already sunk beyond reach. She hadn’t worked for days and in this camp if you didn’t work, you didn’t eat.
---Pg. 19